Needlework Projects

On the right a completed project ... on the left a work in progress.

August in Florida

Temperatures in the low 90's with rain nearly daily. Tropical weather for sure! Cape Coral is in Southwest Florida along the Caloosahatchee River and the Gulf of Mexico. Definitely sub-tropic. We live 6 months under air conditioning and 6 months with windows wide open. Winters are absolutely wonderful. Summers are also great, but we limit our outside activity because of heat and humidity!

Beginning in May ... the weather begins to turn more humid and hot and by July, you are in the midst of a tropic summer watching the weather for hurricanes. I have learned that hurricanes give warnings if you pay attetnion; thus you can get out of town if one is coming your way. We evacuated for one storm and that was Hurricane Andrew. We would have been fine staying because it passed south of us, but who knows and who wants to take a chance. We think we have our things in order to take out in just a few hours; things like important papers, food and gas.

At any rate, summer is the best time to take out-of-state trips and so far this year we have made two. In May we flew to California and Hawaii and in July, we drove to South Carolina, Iowa, and Minnesota.

While I am at home, I look for inside activities and love to read. Last night I put together a quick book list and found I had read over 65 books in the past two years; most are psychology, spiritual, and health related but I throw in some good fiction from time to time also. In fact, I just finished an old series ... The Savannah Series by Eugenia Price. I am interested in reading established authors and was also interested in learning more about Savannah. They are labeled as romance novels, but I have to say they are at least 50% historical and I learned much about Georgia, early politics and the civil war.

Another activity I've started is needlework. As a small girl I was taught to embroidery and crochet and when I was viewing the video Gandhi last Spring, I was taken by his spinning wheel. To me it was a connection to his past and a down to earth remembrance of his roots. So ... since I have been studying spiritual things, I decided to give needlework a try again and my first project was embroidering monograms our pillowcases. They turned out pretty good, so I then decided to embroidery my sister a pillow for her birthday. I found a design I liked and modified it to fit and got started to complete it for her birthday May 8th. Since I hadn't used my hands and fingers like this I had major aches and pains using ice and anti inflammatory drugs for awhile.

Now I've begun needlepoint and counted cross stitch ... another animal I am teaching myself. I have purchased kits which have instructions, needles, and thread. My first project was small (5" x 5") and turned out pretty good; my second project is 6" x 6", but much more complicated and is also smaller mesh, i.e., 18 stitches per inch versus 12 stitches per inch on the 1st project (plus this is counted cross stitch. I am enjoying this so much, I have already purchased by 3rd project which is 14" x 14" and I think 12 stitches per inch. The thing is the 1st two projects were made for gifts and I am having a hard time wanting to give them away because there is a whole lot of work in them; but I will!

Family Trips & Trials

Jon and I recently took a driving trip to Minnesota. Because of numerous overtures from his cousin to come up this summer, one day I mentioned to Jon: Why not ask if our granddaughter (from Jon's daughter through a former marriage) in South Carolina would like to go and meet her cousins there. Jon basically has only one close living relative who is this Minnesota cousin. Jon's daughter is estranged from her mother, thus, no family ties to that side. So, the objective was two-fold; for the granddaughter to meet and know this family and also to experience life outside a small country town in South Carolina without her parents ... she is 13).

Charlotte and her mother are handicapped (legs amputated at the knee) and Charlotte has used prosthetics since age 2 or so. This was another challenge, though nothing much holds her back, there are some limitations, i.e. stairs are troublesome and the cousin lives in a two story home on a hill which leads down to Lake Ida. No problem for Charlotte, she just took off her prostectics and got around just fine without the prosthetics using the stairs and going down to the lake which she did each day as she loves to swim. She bonded with her cousins, especially another 13 year old, Jake. She is a tom-boy and got along just fine with the other two boys, age 10 and 17. She was introduced to tubing and a seadoo and experienced a wonderful time.

Of course, as a woman, I felt the need to mother her (or rather smother her). She is a very independent 13 year old and it didn't take me long to realize ... she would do just fine without me. She was courteous, but did not want me helping or hovering in any way. This was a good lesson for me which actually began as we left South Carolina. As might have been expected, as the time came close to leaving, she was feeling the fear of leaving on a new adventure, i.e., leaving her parents. So, we decided to not dally, but get everything ready and head on down the road. She didn't have anything to say, but spent the 1st 30 minutes or so sad, with tears looking out the back window of the van. I almost went back to comfort her, but asked myself what I would want if I had been 13 and decided to let her work it out herself. So, after a two hour nap, she awoke with a smile, wide-eyed and was happy to be with us the next two weeks.

Two landmarks she was looking for on the trip: one was the Gateway Arch in St. Louis (which we passed along the way) and the Mall of America in Minneapolis which is a little over 2 hours from the lake. Fortunately, the cousins who live in Eden Prarie, a suburb of Minneapolis, wanted to take her for a couple of nights and they all went to "Camp Snoopy," an amusement park in the mall. Actually, this was a relief to us as we weren't too interested in walking the Mall or Camp Snoopy! And, she had a much better time with younger people.

One stop we made to and from Minnesota was in Osceola, Iowa. This is a good stopping point and my very favorite Aunt Dorothy, in her late 70's (one of my mother's 12 siblings) lives here who has welcomed us before. She welcomed Charlotte also and surprised me greatly by asking her many questions as to her handicap and how Charlotte felt about it. Dorothy is very loving and gave me some insight into why ... she is just very honest and straight forward with people and they respond honestly. Charlotte and her seemed to have a special time together.

Home to South Carolina was a different kind of a story. Jon's daughter had been having some difficult times and transportation was an issue so we decided to give them our third car ... a well taken care of 91 Buick Park Avenue. I had driven it up on our way to pick up Charlotte and they were in the process of transferring title and getting insurance and licensing while we were gone. There were a few issues to be completed when we arrived which didn't take much time to complete. Disappointing, was not receiving the thanks or perceived appreciation for the gift ... but, it is now gone and it is her car.

Also disappointing is the way in which we are treated when we visit. I don't understand it at all, except that it just is! Her statement is to all that she doesn't cook during the week; her husband and daughter take care of themselves as far as food. So, when we arrived Friday nighta, we picked up Kentucky Fried Chicken for all of us. And, everyone enjoyed it, even though usually they take care of themselves. Weekends, there is no breakfast unless I fix it ... so sometimes I do and sometimes we go out. We used to wait until everyone awoke and take them all, but have stopped that idea and just go by ourselves because there is no structure to their life and everyone is ready at different times. Such as, the husband wakes up very early and sometimes naps later in the morniing; the daughter and grandchild may sleep all morning. As far as I am concerned, this is fine except when you have guests or family and I really can't understand someone not at least having food available. It is easy for guests to get a muffin or fix coffee in the morning. When we arrived back from our trip it was early evening, no one offered any food, my husband was a bit hungry and asked me about it, so I looked in the refrigerator and found eggs and hamburger buns so I fixed him an egg sandwich. Then, I find the husband fixing him an egg sandwich also and something out of the freezer for Charlotte. Up until this time (about 8 o'clock) no one had mentioned even being hungry. Were they waiting for us to go get something?

This behavior is not something new, but it is the first time my husband has become aware of it and the feeling is not a good thing. You wonder why you are even there ... to give, give, give with little or no thanks and appreciation shown? There is much, much more to this family story I haven't written, but Jon came away depressed, angry and actually with the thought that he could never count on his daughter to take care of him in his old age if he needed care.

I guess I am left with the question: Am I so out of touch that common courtesies, thoughtfulness and thanks are not apart of some people's life? As for my family, I can't say enough good for their appreciation and generosity they have shown me and I sincerely intend to give back much when I can!

Retirement Realities...

Here we are, Jon and I, retired from the workforce since February 2002. You plan your best because you know your life style will change, i.e., fixed income. We were hopeful to use some of our 401K money for various investments, but with the market as it is, we have found just how c o n s e r v a t i v e we really are! We have found surprises, i.e., our property taxes have doubled, etc. The first full year was full of remodeling projects, resettling projects and a few travel trips. We were busy with many projects.

Now, life is taking a change ... we are noticing a few signs of boredom. I have been practicing and learning Tai Chi twice a week since January which helps, but I want something else. I looked into Art classes and painted some bar stool tops, but just can't find another class that is the right one for me. I've made two basic mandala patterns from instructions and that interests me, but I can seem to get anywhere on my own. Next I tried some embroidery which I hadn't done since my childhood and made a small pillow for my sister.

First, I have decided to try volunteering at our local and very beautiful library. After completing a two page application, this past week I had an interview with the volunteer coordinator. But then, also just this week Jon and I decided to take off for South Carolina, Iowa, and Minnesota for about three weeks. Can you imagine? But, no problem with the volunteer schedule ... they are accustomed to retirement needs and I will begin volunteering when I return in July. I'll be scheduling people for internet use, perhaps shelving books and hopefully, I may move into an internet user trainer if there is an opening.

Second I am taking a proactive stance in getting back to golf. Golf ... we hadn't hit a golf ball in six years so we first went to a driving range to check out our "swing." Much improvement was needed so we next went to another driving range which has group lessons each week. Our "swing" was much improved by this exercise ... thank goodness! So, we have a goal and that is to improve enough to play on a course again with our local friends! Then, too, we'll be able to play with my brother-in-law and sister when they visit. Just hitting the ball again was a good feeling and I do love to be outside on the course. Bad news though, my left back is really hurting ... how could I have swung the club that hard or maybe I was just wild and uncontrolled????

This is sounding like a rant (whine) so I think I just have to accept realities always do change!

I can't believe I'm doing this ...

I'm actually using a Blog, and it's all mine set up by my son, Greggman. He just sent me an email (he lives in Japan-I live in Florida) telling me he would set it up and then another email saying I would probably say I wasn't interested and that he had already set it up. Well ... in between the two emails, I asked myself, do I have anything to say and do I really want to do this ... thinking maybe. So, here I am beginning.

Actually, my relationship with my best friend since high school just recently changed. She emailed me saying she needed to be quiet asking me to discontinue our emails on the current basis (we usually correspond several times a week, sometimes much, much more). She told me we could always talk to each other if we wanted each other's opinion on important things. Then she told me she had been thinking about how our lives were so much different, i.e., we now live coast to coast (she lives in Washington State) and I am married (nearly 15 years) and she is single. So ... I wrote back saying I would honor her request and I haven't heard from her since the end of May.

Of course, this poses questions that I can't answer. I actually had called her upon my return from a month's vacation wanting to "chat" and hear her voice. She did not answer the phone, so I left a message and she returned the above message in an email. I have a slight concern that she is okay, but I will wait awhile before contact again. I certainly would appreciate her contact first ... perhaps it isn't going to happen.

At any rate, the real reason I decided to use this Blog is becasue I am thinking I probably used email conversations to my friend as a sort of a Blog and she got tired of it. This might be a good way to write down my thoughts now that she has opted out.

Two years ago I went through an 8-day personal growth training seminar that changed the way I view life and I continue on a quest for basically "why am I here and how do I want to live my life." I have been reading many, many books on psychology, spirituality, philosophy, religion, etc. I find all of this information fascinating and wish I had found this knowledge much earlier in life. Now at 61 though I just have to go where I can with what time I have left.

Practicing yoga and tai chi has brought a new "light" in my life, along with meditation. I am continually astounded how my "old" thoughts on religion and philosophy have easily changed to a new view and understanding that encompasses all, rather than the few. I have read about Buddhism and like the "middle path" they follow and currently I am researching Taoism. The Eastern view seems to encompass ideas that are more meaningful for living your life.

So ... here I am ... now a blogger