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I didn't watch and trust what you're saying, but just from seeing the capture I thought that it could refer that they're 2nd... after the guy's job, as it's often the case here.

If it was indeed 2nd after another girl, then I'm equally shocked!

posted by PatrickNovember 2, 2004 at 1:19

I'll double check again but... [ e ]

I took it into work and showed the segment to one of my co-workers to verify that I understood it correctly and he said I did.  That it's about being the #2 girl not about being #2 behind his job.

I talked to some woman tonight who said she thought it was pretty common for young girls to basically put up with anything since they haven't learned any better yet.  She said she was that way when she was younger.  Of course that's just one data point.

posted by greggmanNovember 2, 2004 at 11:08

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How sad.  Not just for the girls, but for the guys too.  How can they really fall in love and be close to someone when they're thinking about "backups?"  True love requires true risks, without backups.

posted by caroNovember 2, 2004 at 13:45

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Gah, I have to get out of this country!  I think it's ruining my perspective....couldn't see myself putting up with being #2 yet but give me ten or more years here, and I could see where it would go.  This place is bad for female self-esteem. Gaijin or otherwise...

posted by lu2November 4, 2004 at 16:13

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holy crap, im moving to japan.

posted by GarretNovember 4, 2004 at 21:12

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I'm Gregg's no. 2.

posted by MrSinghNovember 19, 2004 at 3:03

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my bestfriend is the number 2 too. but back here in the states

posted by Shigatsu_AKA_AprilNovember 26, 2004 at 17:36

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Actually, the captions for the choices say "あり or なし" for each of the percentages, so I think the poll is about what percentage of women would *tolerate* being a "#2 girl" not how many actually *are* a #2 girl. Of course, that isn't to say the two percentages aren't close.

posted by kitajunApril 3, 2005 at 3:51

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If you had actually seen the show like I did you would know it was NOT a a "tolerate" question. It was "are you his #2, yes or no?"

posted by greggmanApril 3, 2005 at 9:44

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It's a mistake to consider this as a feminist issue as it works the other way too. I have a Japanese friend currently in the #2 role (though apparently she's offering to up him to #1 if he marries her this year).

posted by RazJuly 2, 2005 at 8:35

Are You His #2 Girl? [ e ]

I think there is a cultural difference about dating between Japan and Western World. The Japanese prefer dating with some women/men because the Japanese think there is a difference between love excitement and comfortable marrige life.

When people talk about dating, it's not necessary to have sexually intimate relationship. Man date with some women as close friends. Some girls are just good for sexual excitement. Some girls are just good for talking. Some girls are good to take care of a man even though she is not a best looking.

During the dating period, man think who is best girl for his future wife. It's depend on if he is ready for marrige or he is just looking for love exitement. That means #2 girl might become #1 girl. 

 For woman, the best boy friend is a good looking, tall, fun, etc.  On the other hand, the best husband is a college grad, high income, honest, etc.

posted by UminoKanataNovember 22, 2005 at 4:18

Hmm ... I wonder ... [ e ]

You know, I wonder what the percentages are with folks who are married:  i.e. the (#2) wife who has to bear most of the headaches and burdens of raising the family and managing the home on her own vs. the (#1) woman that the husband's spending most of his time with while at "work".

Unfortunately, this particular phenomenon exists in every culture.

I could be wrong, but I think the point Gregg was possibly trying to make is why would anyone (man or woman) tolerate such treatment when there are so many others out there.  I imagine there have been many "#2" people (male and female) who've spent the better part of their 20's and 30's trying and hoping their best to become #1 in someone's heart.

The thought that popped into my mind after reading about what Gregg wrote was what discourages the guy to stop such behavior once he marries seeing how he has had such privelages prior to marriage.

posted by globulousNovember 24, 2005 at 3:45

Consider this: [ e ]

How many of these so called #2 Girls have their own #2 Boys?
Another way to look at it: Would you mind being second in line for Angelina Jolie or Brad Pitt?

Example: (Phone rings) Ring, ring.
Matai: Hello, this is Matai
Angelina Jolie: Hi Matai, this is Angelina. Hey, if you aren't busy would you be interested in hanging out with me this weekend? Brad just called and said he won't be able to make it back from filming until Monday.
Matai: Sure Angelina, except this time we're staying at your place.

Second place - Priceless

posted by MataiDecember 24, 2005 at 0:20

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It's so sad how normal this thinking is for japanese girls/women.  They always think "as long as I try hard enough..." and then they wonder why they get treated like crap and complain for the rest of their lives.  But then on the flipside, I see a LOT of foreign men marry japanese girls and find out what a devil she really is, when until they were married she was the sweetest little submissive woman they'd ever seen.

posted by hanaichiDecember 23, 2007 at 14:20

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Ha! Yeah, just think of Crayon Shin Chan's mother, Misae Nohara!  Iron fisted rule! LOL

posted by BarbJSeptember 23, 2008 at 10:33